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Carlyn’s Journey-Time Out, XI

Submitted by on May 7, 2010 – 6:00 AM3 Comments
Carlyn’s Journey-Time Out, XI

Reading back through my last few blogs, it occurred to me that the journey thus far has been so crazy and hectic. Thank goodness it only sounds that way on paper. At the time, it didn’t feel that crazy to me. I have heard from many people who are reading my blogs, and they’ve asked me, “How do you go through so much, yet keep your humor and good attitude?” Well, some of the things Rob and I do are just funny. I often feel that if people could be a fly on the wall in our house, they would never look at us the same. We are both goof balls, and I really try to appreciate the humor in everything. The humor is always there, you just have to find it. Also, there is not a doubt in my mind about God’s plan for my life. It’s to be a mom. It used to make me mad to hear about, or come across people who have…let’s say…an opposite attitude from mine. Sometimes it still upsets me, but now, I just try to pray for those people. You know the ones I’m talking about. They are the ones who are having trouble getting pregnant, and they make it their mission to let everyone know how miserable they are. I have heard of people who refuse to go to their friend’s and families’ baby showers, or they remove themselves from family Christmas gatherings or get togethers because they are so distraught that they can’t have a child of their own. They make the people who can have children feel horrible about there blessings. I want to share with you my outlook on this whole negative attitude. This outlook isn’t  just for infertile people. It can be for anyone who is dealing with something they would rather not be dealing with.

My favorite bible verse is Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  I have always known that I was meant to be a momma, and was blessed to have been brought up in a Christian home, where trusting in God and praying were things we were taught to do, and things our family did often. Now, as an adult, those values have become my rock and my soft place to fall. It is easy for me to have a good attitude, and to push on when I know that I am not in control. The One who is in control has a great plan for my life, and He’d never let me down. Talk about taking the pressure off! It doesn’t matter how many failed procedures Rob and I have, how many years of trying we go through, or how many miscarriages we endure. It is all part of the great plan for my life.  Even if I’m  told tomorrow that I will never have children of my own, I’ll  still know that I’ll  be a mom someday. I might not become a mother the way I had planned to, but I’ll be blessed. If I keep trusting in God, my future and my present will be all I ever want it to be. It will be even more! Is every day of my life sunshine and roses? Of course not. It’s especially not when I’m on hormones, but am I grounded enough to bounce back when I have a bad day? Yes! I am blessed with a wonderful husband, and a great family and friends that I want to enjoy every minute of. Pray for what you want and/or need. Trust in God that He will prosper you, not harm you. Pray that He will give you hope and a future.

I know I have taken a totally different direction this week in my blog. I promise next week, we will get back to Dr. Coo Coo for Tofu.  I am never at a loss for words, but I was struggling to write this week, which has rarely happened to me. I prayed this morning for God to help me write my blog with Dr. Coo Coo, and this is what I ended up with. It works for me, and I hope it works for you, too! I hope it touches your heart, and gives some of you a new way to look at struggles that come your way. Thanks for all of your encouraging words, and for your prayers. I love hearing from you about your journey. If there is anyone I can be praying for, or with, feel free to email me cdspagirl@yahoo.com.  I also invite you to check out my church on Sunday mornings. We have live services, and an AWESOME preacher. www.churchofthehighslands.com You are all invited!

HAPPY MOTHER”S DAY to all of you Mamas. I’ll see you next week!!!!


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3 Comments »

  • Jessica says:

    Has anyone told you lately how completely adorable you are?!

  • Carlyn says:

    Nope! Just you! Thanks Jess!;o)

  • Dr. Annie says:

    I so totally love your article. I have been through the whole fertility struggle and I eventually adopted two beautiful children after being married for 14 years. I came from a large family. I had 10 brothers and sisters and I always felt like I would be a great mom. I never thought it would be hard! Even when I was a small child, I never wanted Barbie dolls. I wanted real baby dolls that I could hold close to me and rock to sleep. Now many years later, I can tell you as we approach Mother’s Day that being a mom is the hardest job I ever had. But it is the most wonderful job all at the same time! There are many challenging things that happen with children and parents, but I know that the only one who knows the plan is God. I daily have to remind myself of the beautiful words from Jeremiah and trust in God’s plan for me. And I read the prayer of Jabez and pray that I will enlarge my territory to serve the Lord. When we truly surrender ourselves and realize that the plan for us may be very different from what we imagine, we can be free to grasp and celebrate whatever life brings to us! I go to sleep holding my comforting rosary beads each night telling God 10 things that I am grateful for at the close of that very day. I awake the next morning and thank Him that he has given me one more day to notice so much beauty and goodness. I know that He is holding my hand and what more can a person ask for!! I pray that your heart’s desire will be fulfilled and many readers will feel a great sense of courage from the story of your journey.

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