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Intimacy Awakening… Sexual Healing for a Healthier Life (Fourth in series)

Submitted by on April 28, 2010 – 6:00 AM4 Comments
Intimacy Awakening…  Sexual Healing for a Healthier Life (Fourth in series)

Photo Courtesy of  http://www.EZPhotography.blogspot.com

“Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul”

~Oscar Wilde

We were created to savor the world through our senses. The smells, the tastes, the sounds, touches and sights awaken us from what can be a dull, daily trance.

The Dave Matthews Band in the song “Ants Marching” best describes what many experience as they journey through an average day. “He (she) gets up each morning does the same old thing” and just repeating another “Ground Hog Day.” Day after day after…

One can go through the daily routine and never marvel at the natural gifts that have been bestowed on us. Meaningful patterns are meaningless if we walk through life in stupidity, ignorant of all that surrounds us.

One can go through life never marveling at the natural gifts of your partner, your lover. They are meaningful if you take the time to cure the soul and incorporate all your senses, intimately together. They are meaningless if you don’t. I know and maybe you do, too.

I LOVE the beach. I hear it, smell it, touch it, see it (from my beach house) and taste it wiping out often on my boogie board! Salt water never tasted so good.

I love the mountains and all of the senses that go along with my monthly visitations. I teach part time at a college north of Atlanta in the Southern Appalachians. I miss living in those mountains. One day I’ll return if only for those visits.

I love life. I embrace life. I fear death. I love intimate moments. Remember that one of us has a plug and one a plug in. Yes, God made it that way! Hmmm…

Often, intimacy must be awakened. Partners must look at the blue sky together, feel the soothing ocean or green grass at their feet, inhale sweet scents and smells together, let the fruits of life and your partner linger on your tongue and reach out to touch the one you love. Yes, even if it’s holding hands or a warm, loving cuddle. I hope you dance together! You must.

Unfortunately, as DMB sings, we can reduce our life to that of a lowly “ant marching” 24/7 and 365. Don’t go their.

You must awaken your awareness to the sacredness of life and loving together through the utilization of ALL your sensory perceptions.

“One can endure sorrow alone, but it takes two to be glad.” (Elbert Hubbard)

The Indigo Girls (I know Amy Ray personally) sing about “multiplying life by the power of two.” Can anyone make a statement of life and love any better then that? I certainly can’t.

As I’ve written dress to undress, practice proper hygiene, LISTEN to your partner always making eye contact, taste your partner’s sweet kisses and touch with REAL feeling and desire.

We all have one thing in common and that is death. I’ve never heard of a corpse utilizing ANY senses. I have never heard of a corpse making love. Have you?

I choose to savor life. I choose “to live (and love) like I’m dying.” (Tim McGraw)

I choose not to be a corpse with my partner. And, I don’t want a corpse as a partner, either.

How about you?

The Attitudes and Latitudes of Tom Yankus

(Mr. Tom may be contacted for individual consultation and group workshops at tom@sunshinemamas.com.)

Photo Courtesy of  http://www.EZPhotography.blogspot.com

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  • Elena Lynch says:

    Nice message Mr. Tom! This is such a great reminder of how we should be living and how we are meant to be living our lives. Live as if we were given a death sentence, or a morbid disease…as it is only a matter of time and time is running out. Suddenly we would relish the little, simple moments that are so precious and too easily taken for granted.

  • Mr. Tom says:

    Hi Elena,
    Thank you so much for those kind words! Elena, we all ARE given a life sentence. We don’t know what is in HIS Master Plan. Tonight, tomorrow, next month? Who know’s what our scheduled date is? Tim McGraw’s song “Live Like You’re Dying” was about his father Tug McGraw who I met when I played pro baseball in the late 1960’s. Tug in his early fifties was diagnosed with a tumor on his brain and lived but a short time after. Tim’s #1 Grammy winning song several years back was dedicated about how his father lived AFTER he realized he had cancer with just months left on this earth.
    I love your words and attitude. You go girl!!!

  • sarah says:

    tom really enjoy reading your series. Today especially hit home. I am a cancer survivor and a mother of many. I constantly am reminded everyday of time or the sentence when i look at my scar and have to live on medication everyday of my life. no option there. I love my family more than anything. The head my Husband i have really reconnected with more over the years. Realizing that powerful message you stated. What is our sentence? We have all we need. We need to let our hair down and havefun everyday. Life is a gift. a great relationship has to be nurtured. I love it. Thanks for keeping us couples in check. What are we waiting for!!!!!

  • Mr. Tom says:

    Hi Sarah,
    What is our “sentence” on this earth? God only knows. So many go through life like DMB sings in “Ants Marching.” “Buffettism” is more then just his songs but it’s a way of life that I adhere to. I’ll be 63 in several weeks but I still have a schoolboy heart! Like…WHY NOT!!! As you stated, “life is a gift” and we need to nurture life every second each and every day.
    My next column is in the works and will be up next Monday/Tuesday. Hint, hint, hint…it deals with our brains in the sexual healing process between partners.